Why is the Work of the Holy Spirit so Important?

Fifth Sunday of Easter

April 28, 2013

Dear friends in Christ.

Whenever you watch a sporting event like basketball or football, baseball or even NASCAR, it is very seldom that you get a glimpse of the people operating the cameras.  Oh, sure, from time to time the network might give you a wide angle shot of the stadium crowd or maybe an unusual angle of home plate, and in that shot you will see one or maybe two different cameras with their operators.  But on most occasions we never see them.  Even though they have the very important job of following the ball as it arcs toward the outfield wall, and capturing all the action of the game so that we feel like we are right there in the stadium we hardly ever see them.  We know they are there because we are being blessed by the important work that they are doing, but in all reality they are the ones who work behind the scenes, as it were.  Well, in many ways this is how the Holy Spirit works in God’s kingdom.  He works behind the scenes.  He works quietly and often times subtly as he does his most important work of calling people to faith in Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior.  Though we can often tell where he is and even sometimes see what he is doing through the work that he has accomplishes, like most camera operators, we never see him.  This is why we want to take a few minutes today to take a look at the important work that the Holy Spirit does so that we might learn why it is so very important for us as Christians.

Well, as Christians, we already know why the work of the Holy Spirit is so very important!  We know that the work of the Holy Spirit is so important because he is the one who calls people to faith through the Word of God.  He is the one who causes faith in Jesus to spring up in a person’s heart so that through that faith they might have eternal life, just as Jesus promised us when he said, “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” (John 3:16, NIV84)  And again, “Whoever believes and is baptized will be saved, but whoever does not believe will be condemned.” (Mark 16:16, NIV84)

Now, if I were to stand up here this morning and tell you that I had a gift of $10.00 for each and every person who came to church today, that would automatically mean that no one would be excluded from that gift.  Each person would be given a $10.00 bill as they left church today.  So, even if you were the last one ushered out of church today, you would have no worries because you trusted me when I said that I had a $10.00 bill for each and every person.  In essence this is the same promise that Jesus made when he went to the cross.  He proclaimed and promised that the benefits of his death and resurrection were for all people.  He ransomed everyone and no one was left out.  But, let me extend that illustration just a little bit more.  What if, as you were leaving church today, I did offer you a $10.00 bill, but for whatever reason instead of taking it and being blessed by an extra $10.00, you simply walked by and didn’t take it.  Even though the money was yours and you would have been blessed by it, you refused to take it and now you are not receiving those blessings.  Not only are you not receiving the blessings, it is your own fault that you did not take the gift that was offered you.  The same is true in God’s kingdom.  It is the Holy Spirit who works in our hearts to call us to faith so that we might receive the blessings that Jesus offers us.  However, if someone resists or refuses to believe all the blame lies on the person who refuses to believe in Jesus.

Sadly, this is our natural spiritual condition and this is why the work of the Holy Spirit is so important!  As Paul tells us in Ephesians, “As for you, you were dead in your transgressions and sins, 2 in which you used to live when you followed the ways of this world and of the ruler of the kingdom of the air, the spirit who is now at work in those who are disobedient. 3 All of us also lived among them at one time, gratifying the cravings of our sinful nature and following its desires and thoughts. Like the rest, we were by nature objects of wrath." (Ephesians 2:1–3, NIV84)

By nature, we were nothing more than spiritually dead and blind enemies of God.  We did not naturally come to faith in Jesus as our Savior nor did we, one day, out of the blue, simply decide that we were going to become Christians and follow Jesus for the rest of our life.  No; because by nature we were no different than a corpse lying in a coffin!  Though a well meaning pastor might have promised us a gift of $10.00, we would not have been able to take it.  Even if he had come to our coffin and placed the bill in our hand so that we took it to our grave, it would have done us no good, because we were dead and blind enemies of God. 

But now, everything has changed because of the important work that the Holy Spirit has been about in our hearts!  The Apostle Paul says it this way, “Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, 2 through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. 3 Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; 4 perseverance, character; and character, hope. 5 And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us. 6 You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. 7 Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous man, though for a good man someone might possibly dare to die. 8 But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. 9 Since we have now been justified by his blood, how much more shall we be saved from God’s wrath through him! 10 For if, when we were God’s enemies, we were reconciled to him through the death of his Son, how much more, having been reconciled, shall we be saved through his life! 11 Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation." (Romans 5:1–11, NIV84)

We are at peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ who died for us while we were still sinners only because the Lord himself poured out upon us, the promised Holy Spirit.  It is through the work of the Holy Spirit that we have been called to faith by the Gospel.  It is through the work of the Holy Spirit calling us to faith, in most cases through the water connected with the Word in baptism, that we now believe in Jesus as our Savior.  It is through the work of the Holy Spirit that we have been gathered together as believers and enlightened with his gifts, sanctified—made holy—and kept in the one true faith in Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior.  It is the Holy Spirit who works through the Gospel in the Word and in the Sacraments to call us to faith and strengthen our faith in Jesus who has freed us from our sins by his death and resurrection. 

This is the work that the Holy Spirit is continually doing, and this is the work in which we participate every time we take the Word of God with us.  Though we have no power to call someone to faith, we have many, many opportunities to plant the seeds of God’s Word in a person’s heart by humbly and confidently sharing our faith.  We have many opportunities to tell others about Jesus, their Savior, who died on the cross and rose again from the dead, so that through these beautiful words of the Gospel the Holy Spirit might have the opportunity to work in another person’s heart and cause the seeds of faith to grow.

What greater, more important work could there be than the work that the Holy Spirit does!  Though we might expect to find the Holy Spirit right in the middle of the picture, like the reporters who cover the sports action, he is the one who works behind the scenes, like the camera operators.  Though we have never seen him, we know that he is at work.  He is at work in our hearts today, strengthening our faith in Jesus Christ as our Savior.  Yet, he is also at work in every part of the World.  He is working even now, every place that the Word of God is being shared and taught.  He is working through that word, calling people to faith in Jesus Christ their Savior, strengthening their faith, enlightening them with his gifts, sanctifying them and keeping them in the one true faith, in Jesus their Lord and Savior.

Amen.

Pastor David M. Shilling

GraceEvangelical Lutheran Church--Le Sueur, MN

What is Jesus' Humiliation and Exaltation all about?

Series: Growing Together in God's Grace 

Fifth Sunday in Lent  

March 17, 2013

Dear friends in Christ.

It was back in 1881 when Mark Twain’s first attempt at historical fiction was published.  Published first in Canada in 1881 and then in the US in 1882, The Prince and the Pauper, was a story that Twain set wrote about two young boys who are identical in appearance.  One is a pauper, a very poor boy, who lives with and abusive father.  The other is Prince Edward, Son of King Henry VIII and heir to the throne of England.  In the course of the story the two boys meet and wind up trading clothes and changing places.  Thus the young pauper finds himself elevated to the status of prince, while the prince finds himself humiliated to the position of a peasant.

In many ways this is a picture of what Jesus, our Savior did for us.  It wasn’t that he traded places with someone who looked exactly like him.  Instead, he humbled himself and made himself just like we are so that he could free us from our sins.  He humbled himself to free us from our sins, and then when his work on earth was complete, he was once again exalted to the highest place in heaven by his heavenly Father.  But what does all of this mean?  What does the Bible tell us about Jesus humiliation and his exaltation? 

To answer that question, we need to start at the beginning.  We need to start with what the Bible has to tell us about Jesus humbling himself, which is what the Apostle Paul explains in his letter to the Philippians, where Paul writes, “Christ Jesus: who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage; (grasped, NIV84) 7 rather, he made himself nothing by taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. 8 And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death— even death on a cross!" (Philippians 2:6–8, NIV)

Essentially what Paul is telling us is that even though Jesus’ very nature is true God, he did not consider that he had to hang onto his equality with God the Father at all costs.  Instead, he willingly humbled himself; he took on human flesh and blood, and made himself just like one of us.  In doing this, Jesus set aside his divine authority and power and did not make full use of it while he was here on the earth.  Take for example Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane.  He was there with his disciples and he knew everything that was going to happen that night so he went out and met the mob at the entrance.  When Jesus told them that he was the one they were looking for, they all fell over, backward.  But that was all he did.  Had he wanted to he could have had more than six legions of angels at his disposal, but all he did was knock the soldiers backward to show them that he was allowing them to arrest him.  Once they got back to their feet, he allowed them to take him as a prisoner to the High Priest, and in this way Jesus set in motion the events that would lead to our salvation, just as Paul tells us again in 2 Corinthians, “For you know the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, that though he was rich, yet for your sakes he became poor, so that you through his poverty might become rich." (2 Corinthians 8:9, NIV84)

During the past weeks of this season of Lent, we have been reminding ourselves of how Jesus did, indeed, become poor for us so that we might become rich by his poverty.  We have been reminding ourselves of how Jesus did, indeed, humble himself so that he might save us from our sins.  But when it comes right down to it, Jesus’ humiliation is not something we save only for the season of Lent.  Rather it is something that we remember each time we confess our faith.  In fact, in just a few minutes, as we take time to confess our faith together according to the Apostle’s Creed, we will confess the very steps of Jesus humiliation here on earth.  We will confess how Jesus humbled himself by being conceived by the Holy Spirit in the womb of the virgin Mary.  He humbled himself by being born in the same way that babies have been born since the beginning of time.  There was nothing special or miraculous about his birth  Though it was miraculous that this baby was true God, born as the Savior of the world, he was also born true man—a helpless baby born in a very lowly way—born in a stable and laid in a manger.  Though we don’t confess it in the creed, we also know about Jesus humble life, how he was tempted in every way that we are, but was without sin.  We know how he suffered under Pontius Pilate where he was mocked and whipped and ridiculed and beaten.  He was crucified like a criminal.  He died!  Our true God, who cannot die, humbled himself and became obedient even to death on the cross so that he could free us from our sins.  Then, when he had died, he was buried in the ground.  Just as we bury those who have died, so also Jesus was buried, just like we will all be buried, one day.

It was in this way that Jesus humbled himself for us.  He came to earth lived as a human being.  He proclaimed the Word of God, taking the message of salvation wherever he went.  He moved purposefully, moving always forward, moving ever closer to the moment of giving his life on the cross.  Yet, while on earth he never made full use of his divine glory, power, or authority.  It was not until after his death that he was exalted once again, and began making full use of his heavenly power and glory.  As the writer to the Hebrews tells us, “But we see Jesus, who was made a little lower than the angels, now crowned with glory and honor because he suffered death, so that by the grace of God he might taste death for everyone." (Hebrews 2:9, NIV84) Or as Paul tells us, “Therefore God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name, 10 that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, 11 and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father." (Philippians 2:9–11, NIV84)  Or as Peter tells us, “But [David] was a prophet and knew that God had promised him on oath that he would place one of his descendants on his throne. 31 Seeing what was ahead, he spoke of the resurrection of the Christ, that he was not abandoned to the grave, nor did his body see decay. 32 God has raised this Jesus to life, and we are all witnesses of the fact. 33 Exalted to the right hand of God, he has received from the Father the promised Holy Spirit and has poured out what you now see and hear… 36 “Therefore let all Israel be assured of this: God has made this Jesus, whom you crucified, both Lord and Christ.”" (Acts 2:30–36, NIV84)  And again Peter tells us, “God exalted him to his own right hand as Prince and Savior that he might give repentance and forgiveness of sins to Israel." (Acts 5:31, NIV84)

In Twain’s story of The Prince and the Pauper, the prince became a pauper only for a time.  After that he went back to being a prince again.  Now, if you’ve ever read the story it took a bit of doing for the prince to finally return to his rightful position of leadership as the heir to the throne of England.  However, for Jesus it didn’t take all that to do.  Rather, when the time came Jesus began making full use of his divine power and authority, just as we confess in the Apostle’s Creed, “He descended into hell  The third day he rose again from the dead.  He ascended into heaven and is seated at the right hand of God the Father almighty.  From there he will come to judge the living and the dead.”

Now, I don’t know about you, but when I was younger I thought Jesus descended into hell to suffer there for our sins.  But that is not the case because as we learn from Colossians, “When you were dead in your sins and in the uncircumcision of your sinful nature, God made you alive with Christ. He forgave us all our sins, 14 having canceled the written code, with its regulations, that was against us and that stood opposed to us; he took it away, nailing it to the cross. 15 And having disarmed the powers and authorities, he made a public spectacle of them, triumphing over them by the cross. (Colossians 2:13–15, NIV84)

In other words, it was on the cross where Jesus removed our sins and destroyed the power of the devil.  When he cried out, “It is Finished,” we knew his work of salvation had been completed.  Though Jesus died and his body was placed in the grave, the Lord did not allow his body to see decay.  Then, on the third day, Jesus was raised to life by the power of God the Father, and, as Peter tells us, “Christ died for sins once for all, the righteous for the unrighteous, to bring you to God. He was put to death in the body but made alive by the Spirit, 19 through whom also he went and preached to the spirits in prison 20 who disobeyed long ago when God waited patiently in the days of Noah while the ark was being built. In it only a few people, eight in all, were saved through water, 21 and this water symbolizes baptism that now saves you also—not the removal of dirt from the body but the pledge of a good conscience toward God. It saves you by the resurrection of Jesus Christ, 22 who has gone into heaven and is at God’s right hand—with angels, authorities and powers in submission to him." (1 Peter 3:15–22, NIV84)

This was Jesus victory parade!  In the same way that we throw victory parades for Super Bowl champions, World Series winners, and so many others, so also the Bible pictures Jesus’ descent into hell as his victory parade.  He had won the victory over the devil and his evil angels, and now he marched right down the “main street” of hell, so to speak, proclaiming his victory over the devil and all who refused to believe in him.  This, together with the fact that Jesus was raised to life by the power of the Holy Spirit, was the beginning of his exaltation.  This was the beginning of Jesus once again making full use of his divine power and authority. This is our assurance that our Jesus has freed us from our sins. This is our assurance that our salvation is complete in him.  This is our assurance that just as Jesus was raised from the dead, so also will Jesus raise us from the dead, as Paul reminds us, “For as in Adam all die, so in Christ all will be made alive. 23 But each in his own turn: Christ, the firstfruits; then, when he comes, those who belong to him." (1 Corinthians 15:22–23, NIV84)

What a comfort it is to know that Jesus our Savior who willingly humbled himself to free us from our sins, has now been exalted to the highest place that heaven offers and has been given the name that is above every name.  What a comfort it is for us to know that Jesus, the God-man is exalted forever in his heavenly kingdom where he once again is making full use of his divine authority and power so that he might work in our lives as he leads us on our journey home to heaven.  What a comfort it is to know that in the same way the prince in The Prince and the Pauper did regain his rightful place as King of England, so also our Savior has returned to his throne of Glory.  Though he willingly humbled himself, he did it to redeem us.  When his work of redemption was completed, he was once again exalted to his former glory, demonstrating that he fulfilled his work and that we have salvation through faith in him.  This is what Jesus humiliation and exaltation are all about.  Amen.

Pastor David M. Shilling

Grace Evangelical Lutheran Church--Le Sueur, MN

Gentlemen, Lovingly Cherish Your Wives! (Ephesians 5:25-33)

Series:   What I'd Like to Know Is… (3/6)

August 12, 2012

Dear friends in Christ.

Fourteen years ago today, at this very moment, (roughly 9:30 AM)  my wife and I were probably beginning our descent into Charlotte, NC, which was where we would catch the connecting flight to Ft. Lauderdale, which is where we would continue the joyful adventure that was our honeymoon.  Though it had only been a few days since I had promised my love and my faithfulness to her, I had lovingly cherished her for the four years that we dated before we were married.  Though fourteen years have passed for us, my love for her has only grown.  I have continued to lovingly cherish my wife as the precious gift which my heavenly Father gave to me.  And yet, even though I can honestly say all of this to you, I cannot tell you that I have done any of it perfectly.  For as I studied the words of our lesson and the expectations that the Lord has placed on me as a man, and a husband and a father, I was cut to the heart to realize that though I have lovingly cherished my wife for the past fourteen years, I have nowhere near lovingly cherished my wife in the way that the Lord would have me. 

Take a look at what I mean, turn with me to our lesson in Ephesians and take a look at the responsibilities with which the Lord is charging us as men and husbands.  Paul writes, “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body. 31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” 32 This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband." (Ephesians 5:25–33, NIV84)

Wow!  These are some very powerful words.  These are some very serious responsibilities with which the Lord God, our heavenly Father is charging us as men.  And these responsibilities, though they are being proclaimed to husbands, do not only apply to husbands!  These responsibilities with which the Lord is charging husbands today are responsibilities with which he is charging every single male person; whether he is a young boy, a teen-ager, a young man, a middle-aged man, an elderly man, a husband, or a father.  If you are male, whether you are married or not, whether you are young or whether you are old, the Lord your God, your heavenly Father, is charging you to lovingly cherish your wife!  Lovingly cherish your wife through your words and actions in marriage, outside of marriage, before you are married, and especially after you have been married.

But how do I do that?  Take a look again at verse 25 and following: “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless." (Ephesians 5:25–27, NIV84)

With just a few simple words, the Lord lays out exactly what he wants us, as men, to do for women, and especially for our wives.  He wants us to love them.  But the love talked about here is not the love of some gushy emotion that moves us into fleshly lusts of passion like we see on TV where couples who barely know each other are jumping into bed for thrills and giggles.  No.  The Lord wants us to love our wives with the same type of self-sacrificing love with which Christ loved the church.  This is agape love; self-sacrificing love.  This is love that has nothing to do with whether that loved is deserved or not.  This is the love that moved the Lord, our God, to write our names in the Lamb’s Book of Life, even though there is not single one of us who did anything to deserve it!  This is the love that Christ bestowed upon his church, his people, each and every one of us when he loved us so deeply and so strongly that he gave up his life for us on the cross, to wash us clean of our sins, so that we could be presented to himself as a radiant, stain-free bride.  This is the kind of love that moved mothers to cover their children and moved husbands, fiancées, and even boy-friends to step between the shooter and the women who were with them, when shots rang out in that Colorado theater last month.  This is the kind of love that in some cases caused men and women to give up their lives so that others might live.

This is the self-sacrificing love with which the Lord calls husbands to cherish their wives.  This is the self-sacrificing love with which the Lord charges young men and teen-boys to cherish their girl-friends and fiancées so that they do not, in any way steal the gift of virginity which is a woman’s gift to give only to her husband on her wedding night.  This is the self-sacrificing love with which the Lord wants us to cherish our wives and the women in our lives, so that we do not give into the temptation of pornography, whether it be the soft pornography that we see on a daily basis on magazine covers in the checkout lines of stores everywhere, or it be the hard-core pornography that so many men seek out in magazines and on the internet.  This is the self-sacrificing love with which the Lord wants us to crucify ourselves and our own evil desires so that we turn to him in repentance for our sins.  This is the self-sacrificing love that moves us to no longer look for what we can get out of a relationship and moves us to no longer see our wives as nothing more than a cook, a baby-sitter, a clothes washer, and a sex partner.  Rather this is the type of love that moves us to see her as the God given treasure that she is!  A woman to be cherished, to be nurtured, and to be loved with the same self-sacrificing love with which Christ loved his church and even handed over his very life unto death for her.

Gentlemen, as sons of our heavenly Father, the Lord our God wants us to lovingly cherish our wives in the same way that Christ lovingly cherished his church, just as Paul tells us in verses 28 and following, “In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body." (Ephesians 5:28–30, NIV84)

Now, can I get a show of hands?  How many of you hate your own body?  How many of you, if given the chance, would do everything you can to purposefully hurt or harm your own body?  None of us here!  Good grief, we stub our toes and suddenly we are hopping around the living room like neurotic bunnies or collapsed in a chair weeping like little children.  We get a paper cut, and suddenly we can’t mow the lawn because the vibrations are causing too much pain for us to bear.  If our head begins to ache, or our muscles tense, it’s off to the medicine cupboard for a couple of aspirin.  If we are tired, we sit down to rest in our favorite chair.  If we’re bored, we flip on the TV to see what’s on.  If we’re thirsty we get something to drink.  If we’re hungry we get something to eat.  None of us hates our own bodies, but we take care of them, we feed them and nourish them because we love our bodies.  In truth, some of us like our bodies a whole lot more than we should, which is why the diet and nutrition industry is so huge in our country. 

But all joking aside, Gentlemen, it is very clear what the Lord is saying to us!  He is calling on us to lovingly cherish our wives.  He is calling on us to love our wives, to care for our wives, and to nurture our wives in the same way that we love, and care for, and nurture our own bodies.  He is calling on us to take the role of nurturer in our homes by feeding our families with the word of God.  That means, men, that your heavenly Father is calling on you to recognize your role as spiritual leader in your family.  It is your responsibility, men, to live as an example for your children.  It is your responsibility, men to teach your children about Jesus, to bring them to Sunday School so that they can learn about their Savior, and bring your wife to Bible Study so that the two of you can grow together in God’s Word.  It is your responsibility, men to change your habits and to teach your family that Sunday is the most important day of the week; that Sunday is not a day for sleeping in.  You can take a nap after church!  You can go to bed early on Sunday night, but Sunday is not a day for sleeping in!  It is your responsibility, men, to teach your children and your family what my father taught me, and I quote, “I don’t care how late you stay up on Saturday, you will be awake and attentive in church on Sunday morning even if I have to sit next to you and keep poking you all the way through the service.”  I know it might sound legalistic, but by my father’s example, I learned just how important it was for me to be in worship.  It is because of my Father’s example that my children are always in church.  Even if I wasn’t the Pastor, my children would be in church with me every week.  They would be in Sunday School while my wife and I attended Bible Study, and even if I wasn’t a Pastor, we would still be sending our children to the nearest WELS school we could find.  We would be doing this because my job as husband and father is to nurture my family in the word of God through my teaching, through my example, through my words, and through my actions. 

But why is this our responsibility?  Why is it important for us to lovingly cherish our wives like this?  Take a look at what Paul tells us in verses 32-33: “This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband." (Ephesians 5:32–33, NIV84) 

It is so important for us to lovingly cherish our wives, because marriage is the sacred gift that the Lord God instituted between one man and one woman.  No matter what society might say, marriage is the gift that the Lord instituted between one man and one woman.  It is important for us to lovingly cherish our wives like this because just as our bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, so also our marriages are a picture of Christ and his Church.  In the same way that Christ lovingly cherished his bride, the church, so also we, as husbands are called on to lovingly cherish our brides, the women whom the Lord has given to stand by our sides; the mothers of our children; the women who have agreed to marry us, the girls and women who have entered into a relationship with us as our girl-friends. 

So then, how do we do it?  How do we lovingly cherish our wives as God would have us do?  Let me give you 10 practical ways to lovingly cherish your wives as God would have you.  These come an audio CD by Pastor Paul Tsika.  Those of you who have gone through my pre-marriage course will recognize them: 

1)    Refuse to use harsh and condescending words when talking to her.

2)    Praise her before others, especially in front of your children. 

3)    Be attentive to her and what she is saying: Stop what you are doing, look into her eyes, and really listen, with your heart, to what she is saying to you. 

4)    Ask for and consider her counsel; she is your life partner. 

5)    Provide her with resources that she needs to fulfill her responsibilities. 

6)    Never embarrass her in front of others by exposing her weaknesses. 

7)    Dwell on positive qualities as much as possible. 

8)    Never allow children to talk disrespectfully to her. 

9)    Use kindness and gentleness in all your dealings with her. 

10) Attribute the best possible motives to her actions. 

 The last three come from me. 

1)     Get yourself a copy of The Five Love Languages by Dr. Gary Chapman. 

2)     Read it and discover what your wife’s primary love language is. 

3)     Speak to her in her primary love language every single day. 

Laura’s primary love language is quality time, and every day, I make sure that I am in the kitchen with her while she is cooking supper.  I’m usually doing the dishes at that time so that we can have more quality time later.

The final thing that I have for you today on how to lovingly cherish your wife is really the first thing, and we will close with it.  Turn to the Lord in repentance for all your failings and has for his forgiveness.  Though it is not our normal practice, we will close our sermon today with our confession and God’s forgiveness.  Gentlemen, take out of your bulletins the ½ sheet insert and join me in repentant confession and forgiveness.  In this confession we will be confessing some very specific sins, like pornography.  Though we all struggle with different sins, let us all boldly confess each of these sins so that our joint confession might be a blessing and a source of strength for our brothers and even our sisters who are dealing with these specific sins.

P:        Let us confess our sins to the Lord God, our heaven Father,

P/C:           Almighty God, merciful Father, I, a troubled and repentant sinner, confess that I have sinned against you in my thoughts, my words, and my actions.  I have not loved you with my whole heart; I have not loved others as I should; I have not lovingly cherished my wife as you would have me.  I have not selflessly loved her, nor have I loved her with self-sacrificing love.  I have committed adultery by lusting after others.  I have been tempted by pornography and allowed it to inspire other lusts in my mind.  I have not loved my wife as I love myself, nor have I always recognized or seized my position as the spiritual leader of my family.

Silence for personal confession.

P/C: I am troubled by my sins, and I renounce them before you.  I renounce my sins to you and seek to go and leave my life of sin.  Lord Jesus, I ask your forgiveness on each and every one of my sins; those I remember and those I do not.  I ask you to cleanse me of my sins, my body, my soul, and my spirit; my heart, my mind, and my will.  Send your Holy Spirit into my heart to assure me of your forgiveness and to help me receive the forgiveness that you so willingly pour out on me.  Help me amend my life and live as your dearly loved son, lovingly cherishing my wife as you lovingly cherished me and gave yourself up for me.

P:        Jesus says to his people; “If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven.”  His death has paid for the guilt of your sins, and indeed the sins of the entire world.  Go now and live in this forgiveness to the glory of our God, Father, Son and Holy Spirit. 

C:      Amen.

P:        And the peace of God, which comes through the forgiveness of sins, the peace that goes beyond all understanding, guard your hearts and your minds through faith in Christ Jesus.  Amen.

Pastor David M. Shilling

Grace Evangelical Lutheran Church--Le Sueur, MN